*Buying Babies*
Not like black market buying. Adoption. That's what is on my mind A LOT lately! I just wish God's plan was written down somewhere so that we would know what to do. However, that would negate the need for faith. Right?
Anyway, we've been thinking about adoption for quite some time. We even went to a meeting for adopting wards of state in MI. We were thisclose to starting the process when I went to the GYN and got some fertility meds.
What really is on my mind is how are we going to pay for this? Seriously. I know that financially we don't really have a LOT of income, but we have enough. Babies don't need two thousand toys and forty outfits. Seriously. And I want to go the cloth diaper route (to save money). I used to have a very cheap nursery in mind. However, we decided that we may only have one chance to do a nursery and so we might as well make it as nice as possible. However, I am going to think sensibly when buying. For instance, a convertible crib, so all we have to buy is a bigger mattress. And, no changing table-how often will it really get used anyway. I can use the top of a dresser!
We know exactly how we're going to decorate. We even have the paint colors picked out. And yet, are we going to have the money to do all this after paying for our child?
It could cost anywhere from $8,000 to $15,000. They have ways to do fundraising, but it still sucks. Why do I have to raise money for my child? Why do I have to be the one to have these issues. There are bunches of people who make $40,000+ more than Paul that just have a baby naturally. It is so crappy. And I know that God will provide for His plan to be met, but it's still so hard.
Here's my collection jar, please donate.
What are you collecting for?
For my children. To have them. To be able to actually afford adoption.
Crappy, crappy, crappy.
Ah well, I guess I just have to trust that God knows what he's doing. I don't have to like it, but I do need to accept it and concede that He knows best for me.
And yet it's still hard. Imagine something that you always wanted. ALWAYS. Something you always wanted to be. And imagine that you always assumed you'd have it. Everyone does. And then it gets ripped from your heart and stomped on. That's what it feels like. Above all else I've always wanted to be a mother. I want to do those fun things like teach them and play with them. Color Easter eggs with them and watch them open Christmas presents.
So, here's to buying babies and praying about God's will. We're still deciding what exactly we should do and what God wants for us. This is the worst part. Looking at the numbers and odds and waiting time and wondering what family would pick us to parent their child. Totally stinks.
Anyway, we've been thinking about adoption for quite some time. We even went to a meeting for adopting wards of state in MI. We were thisclose to starting the process when I went to the GYN and got some fertility meds.
What really is on my mind is how are we going to pay for this? Seriously. I know that financially we don't really have a LOT of income, but we have enough. Babies don't need two thousand toys and forty outfits. Seriously. And I want to go the cloth diaper route (to save money). I used to have a very cheap nursery in mind. However, we decided that we may only have one chance to do a nursery and so we might as well make it as nice as possible. However, I am going to think sensibly when buying. For instance, a convertible crib, so all we have to buy is a bigger mattress. And, no changing table-how often will it really get used anyway. I can use the top of a dresser!
We know exactly how we're going to decorate. We even have the paint colors picked out. And yet, are we going to have the money to do all this after paying for our child?
It could cost anywhere from $8,000 to $15,000. They have ways to do fundraising, but it still sucks. Why do I have to raise money for my child? Why do I have to be the one to have these issues. There are bunches of people who make $40,000+ more than Paul that just have a baby naturally. It is so crappy. And I know that God will provide for His plan to be met, but it's still so hard.
Here's my collection jar, please donate.
What are you collecting for?
For my children. To have them. To be able to actually afford adoption.
Crappy, crappy, crappy.
Ah well, I guess I just have to trust that God knows what he's doing. I don't have to like it, but I do need to accept it and concede that He knows best for me.
And yet it's still hard. Imagine something that you always wanted. ALWAYS. Something you always wanted to be. And imagine that you always assumed you'd have it. Everyone does. And then it gets ripped from your heart and stomped on. That's what it feels like. Above all else I've always wanted to be a mother. I want to do those fun things like teach them and play with them. Color Easter eggs with them and watch them open Christmas presents.
So, here's to buying babies and praying about God's will. We're still deciding what exactly we should do and what God wants for us. This is the worst part. Looking at the numbers and odds and waiting time and wondering what family would pick us to parent their child. Totally stinks.
posted by Rachel at 3:20 PM
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